


What Did I Do Rose

by Jandiqar



Category: Homestuck
Genre: "cheating", Extremely Dubious Consent, F/F, F/M, Sadstuck, Self-Image, Woobie Kanaya
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-04-10
Updated: 2019-04-13
Packaged: 2020-01-11 03:57:38
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Rape/Non-Con
Chapters: 2
Words: 1,217
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18422340
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Jandiqar/pseuds/Jandiqar
Summary: "Kanaya. I have something to tell you.""What Is It My Love""...I..."Here it is. She doesn't love you anymore. You really should have known. It was obvious to anyone with a-"I cheated on you."





	1. A Week After Godhood Celebration Day

Did you accidentally do something? Something you weren't aware of to make your wife hate you? Your name is **KANAYA MARYAM** , and you don't think your wife loves you anymore. You really don't want to go through a human divorce, but you'll basically do whatever to make her happy. Of course, you only know that she's no longer flushed for you because she hasn't so much as looked at you in a week. Ever since she went to that Godhood Celebration Day event in New Portland. Every time you try to bring up a conversation, she simply replies with either a weak one-worded answer or an absent minded groan. Not only that, when you two go to bed... well, not to be crass, but anything that happens instead of sleep is instigated by you, and she always has a sad look on her face afterwards. She says she's fine, but she's not a great liar, despite her incredible gift for human sarcasm. You'd bring this up in your daily meetings with your moirail, but he's busy with his own husband's problems, so he never really suggests any helpful advice. He suggests advice, just not anything helpful.

Today, you're knitting along with Rose. She helped you pick up the hobby and now, it's basically your mainstay activity with each other. You're about to say something when she clears her throat.

"Kanaya. I have something to tell you."

"What Is It My Love"

"...I..."

Here it is. She doesn't love you anymore. You really should have known. It was obvious to anyone with a-

"I cheated on you."

You are stopped cold in your tracks.

"What"

"I... I had sex. With someone else."

Even though you perfectly understood what she said, the only word, the only _concept_ in your mind... is...

"What"

"It... It meant nothing, Kanaya."

"Why"

"I don't know. It just happened so fast."

"When Did It Happen"

"About a week ago. I've just been too ashamed to do anything since."

"Who Was It"

Dammit, Kanaya, say something other than questions! Rage at her, stop her from revealing details, you don't actually want to know about this! So why do you keep asking about it?!

"Was It Vriska? John? _Dave_?"

"No, it was no one we know. I don't even know. Some man."

WHAT?! She potentially threw away her marriage for someone she's never met?!

"Why"

"The man literally walked up to me and asked me to... ' _fuck him._ '"

"And You Just Agreed To That"

"Not at first, no. I told him I was married, but he started rubbing my breasts and waist and... we were in the lobby of a hotel, so we just went back to his room and he..."

"Did You Like It"

"Wait, what?"

"Did You Like It"

"Are you sure you even want to know?"

That's a yes, but you have to see if she even regrets it.

"Did. You. Like It"

"...no."

You can see the lie in her eyes, and she can see the hurt in yours.

"I didn't... I didn't want to like it."

"But You Did"

"Yes."

"I See"

You two sit there for what feels like hours. In pure silence. Never looking at her, but her looking at you the whole time.

"Am... Am I Not Enough?"

She begins to tear up. Normally, you'd do anything to stop her from crying (your pale and red quadrants, when it came to Rose, were always a bit blurred), but now... you've been crying for a while. It's her turn.

"You are! You are so much to me!"

"Then Why"

"He... He just kept touching me, and I didn't realize where we were until we had passed the doorframe of his room. He closed the door and deadbolted it, and started ripping my clothes off. The only time I had full faculty of my senses was when we were done with the whole thing, and he practically threw me out of his room and my clothes behind me. As I lay there in the hallway, naked and quivering, I realized what a terrible mistake I had made and how much I had destroyed. The worst part of the whole thing was that I couldn't see that happen. As though nothing of importance had changed. When I came home, I tried to pretend everything was fine, but everything reminded me of my failure."

Oh. Oh no.

"That"

You understand what happened now.

"That Seems Extremely Non-Consensual"

"But, I enjoyed it most of the time!"

"Did You Start Any Of The Sexual Activities"

"No."

"Then Pleasure Doesnt Matter  
Pleasure Is A Base Biological Reaction  
Consent Is What Matters"

She stares at you for a few moments, then proceeds to sob into her hands. And, now that you understand the situation, you move over and hug her intensely. The only things of importance that have changed are the therapy and nightmares that Rose will have from here on. You still love her. And she... She still loves you.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I saw this pornographic illustration about Rose and some anonymous man, took a shower, and this story came to mind. Sorry for the quick ending, I just don't want to bloat it too much.


	2. Kanaya: Comfort your Wife

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I was gonna do it. I was gonna leave this as a oneshot and write another fic. Turns out, this one isn't done with me yet. I've got another couple of chapters in me.

Your name is **KANAYA MARYAM** , and you have just woken up to screaming. Rose... Rose is screaming in her sleep! You try to wake her up gently for a few moments, until giving up and just slapping her silly.

She wakes up instantly and recoils from you. You stay where you are, like facing a wild animal. You get up from the bed, and turn on the light switch, hoping to show her your face. Maybe that will calm her down? Soon enough, her hyperventilating calms down, and her pupils dilate to normal levels.

"My First Question For You To Answer Is Are You Okay"

"Uh, yeah, yes. I think so."

"Wonderful  
My Second Question Is What The Hell Just Happened"

Of course, you know what just happened. As a troll who's had friends stay over and sleep accidentally, you know what nightmares look like.

"It... It was nothing."

That's a bold-faced lie if you've ever heard one. You put on your "I know you're lying" face.

"Okay, it was a nightmare."

"Thank You  
I Gathered That  
What About"

"Well... the usual."

"It Was Not About SGRUB And You And I Both Know That  
You've Never Screamed Like That Dreaming About Our Past"

"Alright, fine. It was about... New Portland."

You hold her arm.

"Darling I've Been Telling You To Go To Therapy For The Last Few Weeks Now  
Can You Only Dish Out The Psychoanalysis And Not Take It"

"Wow, using an Earth colloquialism against me, how rude. It's not that I can't take therapy, it's that the therapist can't help me."

"How So"

"I'm a goddess. There's no way a mortal therapist will understand everything I've been through."

"I'm Going To Try To Not Be Insulted By That And Just Say That This Hypothetical Therapist Only Needs To Understand One Specific Event"

"Oh, no, I didn't mean-"

"Yes I Know  
You Didn't Mean Me  
But I Am Mortal And I Understand You Well Enough  
Seeing As How Humans Don't Have Moirails  
I'd Say The Concept Of Siblings Is The Closest Thing  
I Beg Of You To Talk To Someone About This"

All of a sudden, you see a light (heh heh Light) appear in Rose's eyes.

"Do You Have An Idea"

"Not only do I have an idea, I might have a solution."


End file.
